Alphabetical Twittelation

Twenty-six consecutive tweets to keep me amused. It was actually quite hard to do without making anything up.




All my ideas for wasting a Sunday afternoon seem to have dried up. :o(>

@matt-fwyalchen - 15:06 20/02/11


Beer does taste better on a Sunday afternoon than it does at any other juncture of the week. Fact.

@matt-fwyalchen - 15:14 20/02/11


Critically, sport is exactly like life: you can do everything perfectly correctly and still not 'get the girl'. @'withheld'

@matt-fwyalchen - 15:26 20/02/11


Damn right! If you completely counter another team you are just giving them 'carte blanche' to have their preferred tactics. @'withheld'

@matt-fwyalchen - 15:35 20/02/11


Every time I do the Sunday Times crossword it stumps me with two clues which I look at an hour later, get immediately, and feel stupid.

@matt-fwyalchen - 15:59 20/02/11


French mustard does not go with roast beef. #justsaying

@matt-fwyalchen - 16:06 20/02/11


Gravy + jeans = washing powder + white, cuboid whirry thing in the kitchen.

@matt-fwyalchen - 16:15 20/02/11


Horseradish sauce has arrived. The day is saved. Hurrah! Hurrah! And thrice, hurrah!!

@matt-fwyalchen - 16:17 20/02/11


I think the 'UK Pushchairs in Pubs Society' should be outlawed. They hunt in packs.

@matt-fwyalchen - 16:50 20/02/11


Joyous news! I've just seen a chav walk into a lamppost. Praise be to the Great Arbiter!

@matt-fwyalchen - 16:56 20/02/11


Kids should not be carted round as an accessory (baggage) to their parents' lifestyle choices. That's all I have to say. @'withheld'

@matt-fwyalchen - 17:04 20/02/11


Lifestyle is (of course) a personal choice. I was agreeing with you. Take a pushchair round 18 holes of golf?! @'withheld'

@matt-fwyalchen - 17:20 20/02/11


Must remember to put the washing on tonight or it'll end up like the time I found myself with one clean sock.

@matt-fwyalchen - 17:40 20/02/11


Now 4 washing loads puts me in my place! I quite like this time of year though. The smell of fresh washing on toasty radiators. @'withheld'

@matt-fwyalchen - 17:50 20/02/11


Off to make myself look human for Monday. My stubble is currently shaming several of the local privets!

@matt-fwyalchen - 18:08 20/02/11


Perhaps secateurs will do the job?!

@matt-fwyalchen - 18:11 20/02/11


Quiche it is for supper, then. Half price in Spar. I do like a good quitch almost as much as a good cwtch.

@matt-fwyalchen - 18:20 20/02/11


Real men MAKE quiche!! (I just don't have time tonight.) @'withheld'

@matt-fwyalchen - 18:28 20/02/11


Seriously, now 'Jus-Rol' do a good shortcrust, I make loads. Surely he can chop cheese, onion and bacon and whisk eggs?! @'withheld'

@matt-fwyalchen - 18:41 20/02/11


Too true, Gareth. Too true. @'withheld'

@matt-fwyalchen - 18:43 20/02/11


Under International Law, and in a Citzens Arrest kind of way, can gobby yoofs be slung 'neath the most convenient local bough?

@matt-fwyalchen - 18:59 20/02/11


Vegans are safe then! @'withheld' @'withheld'

@matt-fwyalchen - 19:04 20/02/11


Why don't satsumas have zips? *Bathes eye.*

@matt-fwyalchen - 19:31 20/02/11


X-ratable bawdiness in form of song coming over my back wall from the pub beer garden tonight. Anyone got a 'Greek Fire' recipe to hand?

@matt-fwyalchen - 19:37 20/02/11


Yes, I'll admit it! I have been very bored and had a lot of time on my hands this afternoon. I apologise now for either verbosity or spamming.

@matt-fwyalchen - 19:41 20/02/11


Zounds and egad! I seem to have run out of letters! If this makes no sense, check my blog. http://fwyalchen.blogspot.com/

@matt-fwyalchen - 20:50 20/02/11